Santosa...

Santosa, or contentment, can take many shapes in our daily lives but most commonly it is thought of as being satisfied with what we have been given. Santosa reminds us of Aparigraha, in the sense that we already have everything we need to be happy and content, but takes it a step further. I find that this is often the way with the Niyamas. They are personal disciplines and force us to look inward in ways we may not naturally be drawn to do with the Yamas.

Santosa is more than being satisfied with what we have in material things, though that's a start. It is being content with where we are on our path in life. It is recognizing that where we are right now is where we are meant to be. However, it does not mean take a seat on the side of the road and get stuck there. Contentment is not complacency, but acceptance. It is knowing that each step on the path is bringing us to the next lesson or experience.

This niyama is really whole in theory; every time I read a different definition of santosa I think, yes, this is the key. The key... to happiness, enlightenment, the way to becoming a better person, etc.  Oop! And there it is - the snare - a 'better' person. This idea of always needing to be bigger and better is etched into the fabric of our society. We are raised to want success and are given a very limited understand of what that means: to be richer, more popular, more famous, climb the corporate ladder to the top. (If I could only lose five pounds he would fall madly in love with me and we'd live happily ever after.) We push and push to be other than we are right now. Do not get me wrong, not all ambition is bad - it can be a driving force that leads us where we are going. But it can also be destructive and cause us to miss the beauty of where we are right now.

Santosa teaches compassion. This week, try letting go of okay-what's-next. Try to be still, and love who you are and where you are at this moment. Be content. Turn off the judging, ambitious mind and just observe how far you have journeyed already.

Engaged...

As in: to be married, ring on the finger, purposed to, on my way to Mrs!

Mala + Engagement Ring

I am so happy right now it is difficult to put into words. I know, me, speechless?! I was when he asked me too - all I could think to say was 'yes yes yes yes yes'. I have been thinking of how to write about this in a yoga way all week - since thats really what this blog is all about. Then I realized that since I am day to day a yogi, that this has everything to do with yoga. And since yoga means union - well marriage just doesn't get more yoga, right?

We in the West are householder yogis. Meaning that we cannot drop everything and just do yoga or meditate or read sacred books around the clock. We have to find our enlightenment and keep our Ahimsa mind while holding a job, paying taxes - living out in the world. This is no excuse to not be as good a yogi as you can be and actually I think it comes with many, many benefits. Householders have marriages or not, have kids or not, have jobs, create art, make a mess of their live and bounce back etc.  There is more choice and many more paths to the divine. As householders with basic needs and social requirements we live and learn  - and love.

It is the choices we make that set us on our path. I have made many to put me right where I am today and I would not want to be anywhere else. Just a few that brought me to Mike... I did theatre in high school, because of this I decided to double major in theatre (and writing) in college, I went to Ithaca (a school I hated on the campus tour and now adore), because I wasn't sure about it Lee Byron (head of the program) helped me pick classes, I ended up in a theatre class I may not have gotten into otherwise, I was assigned to work on The Mysteries of Edwin Drood my freshman year, I met Mike on that crew. We became friends pretty instantly and closer friends after a steel rack of chairs was rolled over my toe backstage and he basically carried me to the dining hall for dinner and back to my dorm after. From that moment on he was the man to depend on... I just didn't get it yet.

Ithaca College - freshmen!

Okay, so it took me about eight years to figure out he was Mr Right. Well, not exactly. About three and a half years ago I had to make a choice. Mike and I were starting to see what was between us but neither wanted to be the first to talk about it - while at the same time someone from my past came back into my life suddenly. Suddenly enough to declare us a couple after a day as if things could go back to the way they were spontaneously. I was happy but confused. On a car ride to Ithaca the next day I thought about both paths. Only one seemed like the one I was meant to be on and it was moving forward, with the person I am now set to marry.

We make big choices, take leaps of faith, go for it, jump in with both feet... and hopefully, if we are in the moment and true to ourselves, we reap big benefits because we are choosing love every single time.